Dirty Laundry, Chewed Up Cushions, Ice Cream and other Life Lessons. | Life Love and Hiccups: Dirty Laundry, Chewed Up Cushions, Ice Cream and other Life Lessons.
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Tuesday, 9 July 2013

Dirty Laundry, Chewed Up Cushions, Ice Cream and other Life Lessons.

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Yesterday all plans were cancelled due to a couple of seals being let loose in our house, at least that's what it sounded like.

Simply put, the kids were sick and too busy coughing their guts up to consider doing anything except create chaos at home.

You think I am exaggerating when I say they created chaos aren't you. Trust me I'm not.

One of my boys (not mentioning any names - SAM) did a disappearing act with some of the neighbourhood kids. Although he was under Dr's orders to rest and stay warm, he decided to raise some money for a Balinese Orphanage and snuck out to - you guessed it, sell lollies to the neighbours. Seriously God help our poor neighbours - I really am so sorry you live near us.

I answered a knock on the door from one of the boys Dad's asking if they were at our house (which they weren't) and we suddenly realised Sam and friends weren't where they said they would be and had instead gone AWOL. Consequently this sparked a big search party and at the point we were about to call the police fearing the worst, they wandered back down the street with their seven bucks in earnings and completely oblivious to the panic they had created.

NOT HAPPY JAN

On another note I asked the boys to go and get their dirty laundry from their bedrooms, which surprisingly enough they obliged. However when they came back downstairs with two pairs of undies, a jumper, a beanie and a pair of pyjamas ... between them, I knew it was too good to be true.

I took myself upstairs to check for myself and after extracting half their wardrobes from under their beds, I came down with 2 full washing baskets of dirty clothes.

Yeah - thanks for the effort boys.

As I was scrpunging around their rooms for clothes, I was mortified at the mess they had managed to create in just one week of school holidays. So add to the horror of their rooms the image I had in my head of germs running riot through our house, it was enough to stimulate the part of my brain that tells me I must begin immediately a massive cleaning frenzy.

And so I did and I scrubbed down every room in the house, cleaned out bedrooms, disinfected walls, light switches, bed heads and any touchable surface, sorted out wardrobes and cupboards and drawers until I fell into an exhausted heap hours later, only to discover this...


Whilst I had been busy degermifying out house, the dogs had decided to make lunch out of some of my favourite cushions and the kids had been too busy playing Playstation to notice.

Again NOT HAPPY JAN.

Despite the chaos, and despite the confusion of coughs, cushions and disappearing children, one kid did manage to bring a big smile to my face and spark an idea in my head.

This is Flynn, hoeing in to a big slice of cake.



The smile and the noises that were coming out of that kid as he devoured his cake was just what I needed to inspire me. You know those mmmmmm mmm ahhhhhh *Scoff scoff* mmmmm mmm noises someone makes when they are seriously enjoying their food?

Yep that.

And so I planted my tired mamas butt on a stool and I smashed a bucket of Sara Lee Cookies and Cream ice cream all to myself, right there in front of them.

I even made all the mmmmmm mmm ahhhhhh *scoff scoff* mmmmm noises to you know just make sure the kids knew how damn good that icecream was.

And when they begged me for just one scoop, just one taste, I mumbled through a mouthful of icecream that I was the one that cleaned their bedrooms, I was the one that had a heart attack when one of them went missing, I was the one that has to spend the next few hours sewing up cushions because they didn't think to intervene, and that one day when they have children of their own, they WILL understand why I am NOT sharing my God Damn ice cream.

I also told them that when that day comes, I will be happy to pull up an extra stool or three, hand them a spoon and roll a bucket of Sara Lee together.

That my friends, is how I am surviving these school holidays. How are you coping?